Once upon a time there lived a man who had a maddening passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. Then one day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, "She is such a sweet and gentle girl, she will never go for this kind of carrying on." So he made the supreme sacrifice, he gave up baked beans. They married shortly thereafter.

Some months later, his car broke down on the way home from work and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her that he would be late because he had several miles to walk home. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the odor of freshly baked beans was overwhelming. Since he still had several miles to walk, he figured that he could work off any ill effects before he got home, so he stopped at the cafe.

Before leaving, he had eaten three large orders of baked beans. All the way home he pooted and pooted and after arriving felt reasonably safe that he had pooted the last. His wife seemed somewhat excited and thrilled to see him and exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for dinner tonight." She then blindfolded him and led him to the table. He seated himself, and just as she was ready to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She made him promise not to touch the blindfold until she returned, then she went to answer the phone. Seizing the opportunity he shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but as ripe as rotten eggs. He took the napkin from his lap and quickly fanned the air about him. Things had just returned to normal when he felt another urge coming over him, so he shifted his weight to the other leg and let go again. This one was a prize-winner. While keeping his ear on the conversation in the hall, he went on like this for ten minutes until he knew the phone farewells indicated the end of his freedom. He placed his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it and, smiling contentedly to himself, was the very picture of innocence when his wife returned. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked and of course he had not. At this point, she removed the blindfold and there was his surprise - twelve dinner guests seated around the table for a happy birthday party.